Level: Upper-Intermediate/Advanced
English- the Holistic Path
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| Countdown to English |
Some of us were born in English speaking countries because karmically we´d earned this privilege in past lives. I, for one, remembered in a sensory deprivation tank, that I was once a Zulu chieftain who learnt English from the explorer Doctor Livingstone. Native Portugese speakers and those of other languages in general need to learn English to raise their consciousness in both the material world (university, business, the entertainment industry) and the spiritual. The paths are not seperate, they are holistic, they are one and the same. If I were to say to you that an athlete in the supreme physical condition of his life would never reach the top of his game if psychologically he was full of self-doubt and insecurity, you would not argue because the world recognises that psychological preparation is key to sporting accomplishment. Would you then argue that one could learn English without working on the spiritual through meditation, mantra and crystal healing? No, you would not. And if you did, you would be a fool.
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| Early attempts to write in English |
Language is what seperates us humans from our fellow planetary beings. Language evolved from the caves of hunter gatherers to be the laws and poetry of the great ancient civilisations. The Mayans, Egyptians and the Phoenicians though seperated by thousands of miles and years shared one common goal - the reinvention of English. In the beginning, according to the Bible, there was one common language, then came Babylon and English would lie dormant for what Krishna calls Kali Yuga the present age, a time of spiritual dissolution.
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| the human mind originally intended to be English |
But the new age is dawning, it begins officially where the Mayan Calendar ends. During this time cosmic waves will be oscillating at what scientists are calling ´a very´ high frequency, and it is not unlikely that interdimensional portals will be opening to allow the Godhead in for a limited time only. What does that mean? It means that open minds and open hearts will receive the grammar from the Godhead, phrasal verb particles will meld with your atomic structures and the English person within us all will grow and bloom like a lotus flower. But how do we prepare for this change of consciousness? Listen. Listen to the answer within you. You already know the answer. Listen again. Did you hear it? No. Well, okay, here are some other ways to spiritually prepare for English the Second Coming. I have taken this information from the guide book to the School of Englightened English as a Second Language, the adepts of which recommend these spiRITUALS become as part of your daily routine as brushing your material teeth or taking your material dog for a walk through the material world.
Mantras and Positive
affirmations:
´The way you think, the way you eat, can influence
your life by 30 to 50 years´ Deepak Chopra, Indian Ayurvedic Physician
An affirmation is a positive statement. NLP
scientists and CIA counter terrorist agents the world over swear by the power
of repeated affirmations in changing states of consciousness.
Repeat the following every morning before
breakfast:
All interwoven events that
have brought me to this moment have occurred and are now in the past. I permit
myself to relax, release, and allow my life in the English language to unfold
with grace, freedom, and love.
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| ´I am an English Person´ |
Allow complete healing of
my Englishness within. All the English I have already learnt is present within
me and I allow more English to enter my Spirit, releasing any negativity about
the learning process.
And then repeat ten times:
I`_____________(your name)
am an English person and I speak perfect English.
You can say this staring at your third eye in the mirror or focusing on the nearest available idol.
Meditation:
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| chakras |
What do Richard Gere,
Gillian Anderson and Moby all have in common? They have all achieved greatness
through the practice of meditation. Meditation in the words of the Buddha is
choosing the path to wisdom. It is about getting in touch with your higher self,
your English self in the space between words. Spending some time alone each day
sitting in a dark room in the lotus position with an English grammar book under
your Mulahdara or Root Chakra will dramatically effect your English. You
may not see the results in a day´s time, a month´s time maybe even in a year´s
time but one day you will be in a state of natural wonderment. The risk of
unguided meditation is that it often leads to narcolepsy and apathy, in severe
cases you can become severed from your astral body.
The experts recommend a mixing of unguided with
guided meditation. I recommend the website http://www.fragrantheart.com/cms/free-audio-meditations
for their wonderful free meditations. You can for
instance do a 20 minute meditation to meet your Guardian Angel. See this week´s TASK!
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| ´Life itself is a meditation´ Raul Julia, Gomez in the Addams Familyi |
Crystal Healing:
We are all made of stardust, and crystals are our oldest relatives, apart from gas. It is dangerous on a material level to expose oneself to gas, our astral bodies love the stuff but unfortunately it easily overcomes our material bodies. Crystals, however, allow us to tap into the energy grid round our bodies. Used in the right way with expert help to align the chakras, they are perfectly safe. In ancient Chinese medicine, Emeralds were used to stimulate memory and ease fatigue. As an English teacher working in London, I would place Emeralds at the corner of every classroom often preferring them to potted plants. When I realised that this didn´t work, I would throw these pebbles at the students if they fell asleep, lost concentration or rested their elbows on the table. The result was astonishing. Suddenly I had their full attention and they hung on every word I said as if their lives depended on it.
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| A teaspoon of british granite every day leads to a 2.2 per cent increase in Englishness. |
GLOSSARY:
New age vocab
Guru
Adept Perito
Astral body corpo astral
Third Eye terceiro olho
Spirit Espírito
Healing Cura
Holistic holística
Affirmation afirmação
TASK: THE FOREST - A GUIDED MEDITATION FOR PAIRS
You are going to take your partner on a guided meditation and vise versa:
Student A:
Read the following to your partner and note down their responses.
Close your eyes and relax. Are you relaxed? Good. Imagine you are walking in a forest. What do you see? What can you hear? Describe your surroundings. How do you feel?
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
In the forest you see a path. What kind of path is it? Describe the path. Where does it go?
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You follow the path. Walking along you suddenly see a wild animal in the middle of the path. What kind of animal is it? What size is it and what is it doing? How do you get passed the animal?
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Further along the path you see a bunch of keys. How many keys are there? Describe the keys. Do you pick them up?
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At the end of the path you come to a wall. Describe the wall. How do you get passed it? What is on the other side of the wall?
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Open your eyes.
Student B:
Read the following to your partner and note down their responses.
Close your eyes and relax. Are you relaxed? Good. Relax some more. Harder. Relax harder. Keep relaxing, relax. RELAX! You are now relaxed and you will listen to me or else.
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You wake up in a mud swamp. You are surrounded by ugly plants and weird creatures. What do you see? Smell? Hear? Feel?
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I don´t believe you. You don´t feel anything, do you? You´re a heartless individual, cold, cold hearted bastard. Wait! What´s that noise? Coming from deep in the dark forest. You start to run? What the hell is chasing you?
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You run down a path. Keep running. Run faster, goddammit. It´s gaining on you. You see a light up ahead. A house. Describe the house.
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In your desperation to escape you imagined the house would be better than it actually is. Actually the house looks worse, much worse than you ever dared imagine. Imagine how bad that is. Describe the house of your nightmares.
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Keep running you fool! The thing is behind you. You go into the house. You go into hell itself. Someone´s inside there waiting for you. Who are they? And what do they do to you???
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Now how do you feel? Don´t worry it was only a dream, it´s over now. Open your eyes.
(at this point wear a scary mask and scream very loudly in the face of Student A)
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